“I should do that.”
I hear this frequently from my clients, friends and even my own mouth. We use it all the time — I should clean the kitchen before the guests come, I should be working, I should exercise more, I should bring a gift to the party, I should find a new job, I should stay at this job…. so many things we think we should be doing!
But I’m wary of should. It’s sneaky and dangerous because it often hides something deeper lurking behind it. By replacing should with different language...
No one would mistake me for a perfectionist.
When I think of perfectionism, the garden variety perfectionism that comes to mind has to do with completing tasks exactly right, redoing what isn’t perfect, endlessly researching a new gadget in order to make sure that you get the exact right one. This perfectionism is an exacting and unforgiving search that typically leaves the practitioner dissatisfied.
Reviewing my stack of applicant resumes, I saw clearly that the most common mistakes were subtle and psychological.
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Pleasantries are trite and routine, and, especially in the office environment, they can stress me out.
If how we spend our money is such a clear reflection of our priorities, shouldn’t we try to spend it in ways that make us truly happy?